Expert Reviewed

How to Make a Man Fall in Love with You

While you can’t control how a man feels about you, there are some things you can do to get his attention and show him that you’re special. By being an authentic, positive presence in a man’s life, you might be able to encourage him to fall in love with you.

Method One of Three:
Attracting Him

  1. 1
    Show that you care about your appearance and health. By putting time and energy into your physical appearance, you will demonstrate to your man that you value your looks and good health. You will also feel more confident about yourself if you feel healthy and strong, and confidence is always attractive.[1]
    • Stay active by going to the gym regularly. Don't skip your workout to spend time with him. Invite him to join you or take a rain check.
    • Keep your hair clean and styled neatly, and pay close attention to your personal hygiene.
    • Put on a little signature scent in the morning or before you go out, or wear scented body lotion for a subtler scent.
    • If you wear makeup, aim for a look that's flattering but simple; don't try to overdo this aspect.
    • Brush your teeth twice daily, floss, and use mouthwash. During the day, use mints or gum to freshen your breath.
    • Do your laundry regularly. Instead of buying a new wardrobe, make the best of what you have. Set up a regular schedule and make sure you always have clean shirts, pants/skirts, undergarments and socks available. Don't let him see stains or unkempt clothing!
  2. 2
    Smile well and often. Your best weapon is always available, completely free, and can't be overused—your winning smile! Flash a genuine grin as often as possible, whether it's directed at your guy or not. It makes you look approachable, and it might actually make you happier.[2][3]
    • Find something to smile about. If you're a bit blue, think of a happy moment or amusing joke to spark a smile. Do you have a favorite pet? A favorite memory? Whatever it is, think of it as often as you need to.
    • Try a slow smile. If you've made eye contact with the man you love, smile at him slowly, letting it spread over your face. If you tend to blush and look down when he's looking at you, let it happen after the smile — you'll be irresistible.
  3. 3
    Make frequent eye contact. Making eye contact is a crucial component of flirtation and it can also increase his feelings of attraction for you. Gaze into his eyes when he is talking to you and don’t be afraid to lock eyes with him even if you are both silent.[4]
    • If you are too nervous to gaze into his eyes or you don't think it is appropriate yet, use quick glances to make frequent eye contact with him. By looking at him for a moment and then looking away, you can show him that you are interested and see if he is interested too.
  4. 4
    Wear soft textures to attract his touch. Studies suggest that people find soft and pleasant textures pleasing and soothing.[5] Try wearing clothing made from microfiber, silk, faux fur, or other soft textures that he'll want to touch. This will make your guy associate these pleasant sensations with being around you.[6]
    • Try wearing red to catch his attention. The color red has been shown to increase feelings of attraction and passion in both men and women. Try wearing a red dress, a red top, or some red lipstick to make him notice you.[7]

Method Two of Three:
Using Your Personality

  1. 1
    Emphasize your similarities. Part of the reason why people feel attracted to each other is due to a sense of connection. If you have things in common with him, emphasize those things in your conversations. For example, if you both love a certain type of music or band, talk to him about it. Just make sure that you do not overemphasize or lie about things you have in common. Doing so may cause him to see you as desperate or dishonest.
  2. 2
    Demonstrate your independence. Being clingy and dependent on someone else for your happiness are not attractive qualities. Instead, try to show him that you are an independent, strong woman. Showing him that you have a great life and that you don’t need someone else to be happy will intrigue him. Keep your plans with friends and family and turn him down for dates now and then so that he knows that you have your own life.[8]
  3. 3
    Be kind and considerate. Being rude to the guy or other people is a quick way to make him lose interest in you. Be polite and kind to the guy you have your eye on and show that you are also kind to others. Demonstrating your kind personality will increase his affection for you.
  4. 4
    Show him what makes you special. Letting a guy see what makes you such a catch is another great way to increase his affection for you. It will intrigue him and make him want to get to know you even better. For example, if you are skilled at playing an instrument, look for an opportunity to play in front of him. Or, if you are an excellent baker, whip up some cookies and share some with him.[9]
  5. 5
    Be a positive force in his life. Most people can manage to be negative all by themselves, so they're drawn to people who focus on the bright side of things. Instead of focusing on what's wrong with your life or talking about the people who annoy you, try to emphasize what's right. Moreover, be pleasant in all that you say toward him and avoid gossiping. Be a positive person in his presence and aim to be positive in general.[10]
    • This isn't to say that you can never complain around him. Everyone complains. But it can be exhausting to listen to someone gripe constantly. Try to keep a rein on it so that he feels warm and fuzzy about his time with you, not tired and down.

Method Three of Three:
Enticing Him

  1. 1
    Maintain a balance. In the beginning of a relationship, it is important to spend lots of time together. During this time, you are just getting to know each other and spending time together should be fun. Don’t fight this urge to spend lots of time with him when you are just starting out, but know when to pull it back. The "scarcity principle" suggests that people are more likely to want and value something that's a bit hard to get.[11] This doesn't mean you have to play mind games with your guy, but make sure that you're not available at the drop of a hat every time he calls. Maintain a good balance between spending time with him and spending time on your own.
    • To get some time away from him, make plans with your friends and family, spend more time alone, or work more to have some time away from him.
    • This strategy may seem odd, but it will be good for both of you. It will give him some time to think about his feelings and it will also give you a chance to think about your feelings. Having some time apart will help the two of you avoid getting bored with each other or taking each other for granted.
  2. 2
    Make him feel needed. Doing things to make your guy feel needed may increase his feelings of affection for you. Asking him to help you with something or even just asking for his advice can make him feel needed and important. For example, you might ask him to help you move some furniture in your bedroom or ask him to help you make a decision about your car insurance.[12]
  3. 3
    Act casual. Remember: you can't actually make him fall in love with you. He's free to choose what he wants. Beyond that, though, people can't always control who they love. If it's simply not there on his end, resist the temptation to punish him for it. Accept that if the relationship is meant to be, it will happen; if not, then you're meant for something better.
    • Avoid using the "girlfriend" term until he has said it first. If you say it too prematurely, he may run and never look back. Even more importantly, avoid all talk of marriage and babies––that will definitely scare him away.

Community Q&A

  • The guy I like is my flatmate and he is older than me. What should I do?
    Answered by Jessica B. Casey
    • Consider all the possible outcomes of dating your flatmate. If your dating relationship doesn’t work out, do you think you both could still continue being flatmates? Would living together be too much of a strain on a new dating relationship? If the age difference has you worried, consider how much age will truly impact your dating. Also consider how compatible you are together, your temperament, values, interests, and priorities. If these all seem to be a close match, then age shouldn’t matter so much.
    Thanks! 125 32
  • I think the guy who I like, likes me back! How do I know for sure?
    Answered by Jessica B. Casey
    • The only way to know for sure it to talk with him about it. No need to spend time and energy trying to guess at what he means when he says something ambiguous. Find a good time to chat with him, tell him how you’ve been feeling, and ask him if he feels the same way. For example, “I have really enjoyed getting to know you over the past few months, and I am interested in pursuing a dating relationship with you. I thought you might feel the same way, but wasn’t sure. Are you interesting in going out to dinner sometime?
    Thanks! 153 68
  • I am fat. What should I do to make the guy fall in love with me?
    Answered by wikiHow Contributor
    • You don't need to do anything. You're beautiful the way you are. And if he can't see that, move on––he's not worth it.
  • What if you both have vastly different interests from each other?
    Answered by wikiHow Contributor
    • Then it's probaly not a good match. If you two don't really have anything in common, you could try to like the things he likes, as you never know, it might influence you to enjoy something new. However, if there is nothing shared, the relationship has less to make it endure and last long-term.
    Thanks! 458 182
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In a Hurry?Edit

One way to make a man fall in love with you is to talk to him about your similar interests, like movies, music, or sports. Don’t be afraid to reveal any talents you have that make you special. When you’re around him, be kind and affectionate, and avoid being clingy or dependent. The more positive you are when you’re around him, the more likely he will be drawn to you. For more advice from our reviewer, like how to use clothes and body language to make a man fall in love with you, read on!


  • Give him some space. Let him hang out with his friends, and once in a while say that you can't come. This will let you find out if he really wants you to be around him or not.
    6 Helpful?  1
  • If you don't know much about him, open room for getting to know each other. There's no harm in having a good conversation with him.
    3 Helpful?  1
  • If you get to know his friends and you become friends with them, he will feel more comfortable around you.
    2 Helpful?  0
  • If you feel the need to flirt, try not to do it too much. For instance, if you flirt-fully tickle him in public, he may think you are weird or get embarrassed to the point where he doesn't want to be near you.
    1 Helpful?  2
  • If you try to move on and he has feelings for you and you still have feelings for him don't be afraid to tell him how you feel.
    1 Helpful?  0
  • Don't fall into the over-analysis black hole! Analyzing your feelings for and interactions with him is one thing, but over-doing it can lead you into a black hole of false assumptions, and you don't want to do that.
    3 Helpful?  0
  • Don't cling to him too much. On the contrary, do not totally ignore him. Give him space if he needs it, and if he's sad, comfort him.
    2 Helpful?  0


  • Don't flirt with his close friends. This will just end up with fights between mates and none of them will care for you.
    552 Helpful?  88
  • Don't put him in a compromising position. Men care about how you feel, even if they're not interested in you romantically. Don't force them to answer a question if they look uncomfortable with it.
    440 Helpful?  104
  • Don't make him feel worthless by ranting on and on about your exes. If you say what you dislike in your exes, he might be put off.
    374 Helpful?  106
  • Don't be annoying and obsessive; if he says he wants to just be friends, accept it, but show that you're still interested if he changes his mind.
    21 Helpful?  3

Expert Review By:

Licensed Professional Counselor

This version of How to Make a Man Fall in Love with You was reviewed by Paul Chernyak, LPC on January 5, 2018.

78 votes - 83%
Co-authors: 328
Views: 4,590,291

Reader Success Stories

  • AT

    Alyssa Topper

    Jun 14, 2016

    "Acting casual. I'm a pretty awkward girl, so I don't really know how to start a conversation and make the person like me because of how awkward I act. This article helped me a lot. I know that you can't make a guy love you, but it's worth a shot to try."..." more
  • A


    May 8, 2017

    "I have similar situation. I've been dating this man for 5 years now. He has recently quit communicating with me. He has a lot on his plate right now. He used to bring me in to help with these issues. Now I'm not on his mind at all."..." more
  • LT

    Lauren Tyler

    Apr 24, 2017

    "I've never been myself around guys, and this has made me realize that maybe the really attractive, popular guys at school with whom I have nothing in common just aren't for me."..." more
  • TB

    Tammy Boggs

    Mar 13, 2017

    "There is my neighbor I fell in deep love for, but I don't know how to get him to fall in love with me. I've known him quite a while now."..." more
  • A


    Jun 19, 2017

    "If you're meant to be, it will be. And you don't have to go to a gym to make him love you. Your beautiful just the way you are."..." more
  • A


    Sep 3, 2017

    "I would like to be with my boyfriend for the rest of my life, so I'm seeking for good and positive notes."
  • AN

    Amber Nortkn

    Jan 17, 2017

    "We just talked and then later he admitted that he likes me, so I admitted too that i like him. "
  • A


    Oct 10, 2016

    "I absolutely loved everything! Every single method helped me so much! Thank you!"
  • EC

    Eldie Conner

    May 20, 2017

    "I love this boy, and I want to show him I love him without having to say it!"
  • KL

    Kassie Lee

    Jun 6, 2017

    "I did all of these, and now I've got a boyfriend who asked me to go to prom."
    Rated this article:
  • A


    Sep 10, 2016

    "Learned not to complain and not to be negative all the time."
  • A


    Jul 8, 2016

    "He started talking to me more - not much, but often. :)"
  • A


    Jun 27, 2017

    "Just the good, basic, practical, sound advice helped."
  • RS

    Rajshree Sharma

    Jul 3, 2016

    "It's amazing! I got to learn so much from this site!"
  • JS

    Jasmine Sing

    Jun 28, 2016

    "Being yourself and being independent helped so much."
  • M


    Apr 11, 2017

    "It helped me very much. I tried this, it succeded."
    Rated this article:
  • A


    Aug 23, 2016

    "Making him feel needed seems like a good idea."
  • A


    Oct 17, 2017

    "I really found what you shouldn't do helpful."
  • LB

    L. Beyene

    Sep 7, 2016

    "Learned that a woman has to be confident."
  • A


    Nov 30, 2016

    "Very practical views and very nice, too."
  • CJ

    Cheryl Jansen

    Oct 28, 2016

    "Self confidence and independence helped."
  • BM

    Ball Mow

    Nov 22, 2016

    "How to get more attractive was helpful."
  • A


    Jul 9, 2016

    "Everything was very helpful, thank you."
  • JP

    Jane Persiao

    May 11, 2016

    "It was good, liked the attracting part."
  • A


    Feb 28, 2017

    "Do not flirt with his close friends."
  • SQ

    Sadia Qureshi

    Apr 17, 2017

    "I feel more confident than before. "
    Rated this article:
  • A


    Jan 27, 2017

    "I loved your article. Thank you."
  • RD

    Rachel De Paz

    Mar 9, 2017

    "Tips and warnings are useful."
  • A


    Jul 27, 2017

    "It really helps me so much."
  • A


    Mar 1, 2017

    "Say no at times to him!"
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