How to Ask Out a Girl at School

If you have a crush on a girl at your school, you might feel nervous about asking her out. Luckily, by getting to know her and waiting for the right time, you can work up the nerve to tell her you’d like to go out with her!


  1. 1
    Establish a relationship. But don't overdo it, stay calm, cool, and collective. Start by asking her for something to play on, like if you're in her class, ask her for a pencil or eraser. Also, you don't want to rush it. If she's slightly interested, she might play about, teasing you for it. Don't worry, it's not that she doesn't like you.
  2. 2
    Compliment her. Use your brain. You can compliment her on something you truly like about her. Don't just say something, just for the sake of saying it. Make her feel good about herself.
  3. 3
    Start a ball game. No, not literally! Be a little far away and look at her, admire her. She'll catch your gaze and look at you. Look away suddenly but keep an eye out for her looking back at you. If she is, get up and walk past her, possibly giving her a little smile as you go.
  4. 4
    Chat with her. Ask her if she has any pets and find out some interesting things. Make sure she knows you inside out as well. But don't talk too much or about anything weird.
  5. 5
    Just be yourself. If you try to be someone else and if there is some leak or you get busted, you will probably make her feel like you are fake.
  6. 6
    Move in closer. Look into her eyes, look lost in her world for a second. Make her get the idea that you like her. Then proceed to look dreamily into her pretty eyes and tell her what you love about her.
  7. 7
    Ask. When the time comes to ask her out, wait for the opportune moment. Trust your instincts; they will tell you when the time is right. It's probably best not to do it in front of her friends or in front of your friends. It's easier for both of you if you are alone. All you have to do is walk up, and ask her to go out with you in a confident manner. You get points for trying.
    • Ask her out directly, in person. Do not send someone else to do it, email/text her, or even do it over the phone. Asking someone on a date should be personal, you should do it yourself, in person. Doing it any other way will show that you lack confidence, and while she may still say yes, she'll be a lot less impressed.
  8. 8
    Be confident, but not cocky. The difference is there, and very noticeable for girls. Make jokes and be self-confident; women love it when men make them laugh. Sometimes girls like boys who are kind of shy but be sure you don't act shy because girls also want you to  be honest and pretending to be somebody else isn't honest.
  9. 9
    Be perceptive. If you see any facial expressions, like an eye raise, make sure you say, "it's okay if you say no."
  10. 10
    If she says no. Just back off for awhile, leave her to cool down, but don't give up hope completely. Some girls like it if you try again.
  11. 11
    If she says "I'll think about it", it's not a good sign, although she could just be nervous, or caught up in the moment, and she's being careful not to make a stupid mistake. Don't bug her about it, let it go a few days - if she doesn't bring it up again, it's a no.
  12. 12
    Don't ask her out as a dare or as a joke. This can really hurt a girl's feelings. Be sure that you are doing it because you want to, if you don't you could really become known as a jerk.
  13. 13
    This is the most important rule. Always remember to make a good impression on her when you ask her out. It's a major bonus point! Never stare at the ground either. Look her in the eye! If you're shy, whisper it in her ear–but never be too shy.

Community Q&A

  • When is the best time to ask a girl out?
    Answered by wikiHow Contributor
    • The right time is when she's alone and you can make a good impression. Don't wait forever for the "perfect" time though - just go for it!
    Thanks! 290 25
  • Can my friend ask her out for me if I'm too embarrassed to do it myself?
    Answered by wikiHow Contributor
    • It's much better to ask her out yourself. Most girls like confident, honest guys who aren't afraid to show they care, so go for it and let her see the real you.
    Thanks! 227 42
  • I asked a girl out several months ago, but she said no. I still like her a lot. Sometimes I hear her say my name, but that is all I hear. Should I try again?
    Answered by wikiHow Contributor
    • There is no reason not to try again, especially if you think that she might be warming to you after a period of thinking things through. Just prepare yourself for possible rejection again, as it's still a real possibility.
    Thanks! 175 42
  • What if if I try and it doesn't work?
    Answered by wikiHow Contributor
    • If she rejects you, then you probably aren't her type. Just like not every girl is your type, not every person is her type. Say "okay" or "I understand," wish her a nice day, and leave. Go easy on yourself, take time to recover and cry, and then find another girl.
    Thanks! 184 48
  • What if you like another girl?
    Answered by wikiHow Contributor
    • That would just be awkward. If you really care for one of them, pick the one that you know will be right for you.
    Thanks! 148 43
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Quick Summary

If you want to ask out a girl at your school, talk to her when you get a chance so she’ll know who you are, even if it’s just to ask if you can borrow her pencil. Over time, work up to longer conversations by asking her questions and sharing things about yourself. Once in awhile, compliment something you really like about her, like her hair or her smile. Pay attention to whether she seems interested in talking to you or appreciates your compliments, which might be signs she likes you too.


  • Keep it cool and if she does like you then give a small sign of you liking her.
    239 Helpful?  17
  • Make sure your breath smells good.
    214 Helpful?  25
  • Don't send someone else to do it for you. If the girl likes you she definitely wouldn't want someone else to ask her out.
    201 Helpful?  27
  • Some girls will notice that you like them, and some won't. If you feel like she doesn't know, then smile or wave at her when you walk by. Try not to look at her all the time, she'll think you're creepy! Just be yourself and wait a while. She might ask you out after a while.
    165 Helpful?  28
  • It may be awkward for you if you start by asking if she likes anyone because she won't necessarily say she likes you out of embarrassment.
    161 Helpful?  29
  • Find out what she likes, so you have something to talk about, that you are sure she will like.
    109 Helpful?  18
  • Make sure you don’t mess up when you ask the girl you really like to go out with you.
    123 Helpful?  22
  • Be casual. Wear some casual clothes, but don't wear your best clothes on a first date or she will think you're trying too hard.
    91 Helpful?  16
  • Try not to stare. Girls don't like it when guys stare at them.
    35 Helpful?  4
  • If you like a girl, just hang out with her for a week or so and then ask her out like this: "Will you go out with me?".
    42 Helpful?  9
  • Don't wait for the girl to approach you. 90% of the time, girls are the ones who like to be approached.
    8 Helpful?  0
  • If you have friends who are her friends too, then see if they can find out if she likes you or anyone else.
    9 Helpful?  3


  • Don't ask her in front of friends, especially if she is shy.
    164 Helpful?  8
  • Don't just go up to her and ask her if she likes you. She might get offended.
    145 Helpful?  8
  • Don't ask super invasive questions about her. Be nice, not a stalker.
    138 Helpful?  12
  • Say you like her, that'll make her feel good about herself, but don't do it as the start of a conversation.
    134 Helpful?  12
  • If another guy starts talking to her do not walk away or show jealousy.
    143 Helpful?  15
  • If you want to ask a girl out to a dance, disco, etc and she says no, do not immediately go and ask someone else out. This will lower your social levels and girls will not want to go out with you because they will think you are desperate.
    131 Helpful?  14
  • Slowly talk to her more and more in a completely casual way before asking her out.
    125 Helpful?  15
  • Don't tell the world if she's not ready. She might have some things she has to tie up first.
    107 Helpful?  16
  • Don't wait around forever, waiting for her to say yes. Just move on to someone else who likes you back!
    108 Helpful?  17

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Categories: Asking Someone Out

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